From The Peopling of New York City

Name: Kanushree Jain

Age: 19

City of origin: New Delhi

When the person came here: Her father suffered business losses and came here with his friend 1990. She came here in 1992.

• I read that women normally follow their husbands, brothers, or other male family members to America. Does this apply to you?

o I followed her father who came here to find work. He found work and an apartment in Flushing Queens for her mother, brother, sister and her in 1992.

• Do female workers face problems when they decide they want to work? If so, what kind of issues arise? (familial duty)

o It would be easier for a woman to get a job through a reference, like a family relation. My mother worked when she had to but now my father makes enough so she doesn’t have to. There aren’t real differences between how the man works and the woman works. The mother would work if she had skills and she needed to but she doesn’t have to work if the father makes enough to support the family. My father wants me and my sister to get an education and rise up in the world. Education leads to respect for myself and for the family and that's a very important thing to my father.

• Are there certain jobs that are more acceptable for Indian men to do over women?

o I feel women are always put down. Like for example a female Indian police officer would have a really hard time. Even working at a restaurant would be more difficult for an Indian woman over an Indian man. Doctor would be the ideal position for an Indian woman. I feel like women are easier to exploit. Like parents wouldn’t really want their daughters to be models or actresses because they can be taken advantage of. If a family has a good economic background and stability, guys have an easier time convincing their family to model or act. Girls are usually not allowed. Other families wouldn’t let either sex to follow these careers. People sometimes run away from home and do it anyway. For the most part, I think most parents don’t approve of their children going into the acting field.

• How is the way women are viewed in business in New York different from the manner in which they are viewed in their hometowns?

o Well, it’s a very time related question because now women aren’t as suppressed in India now but in my mom’s time. My mom was born in a village called Haryana. And though India’s progressing, China, too, India still has villages where there is conservative thinking. So when my mom was growing up she thought her domain would be housewife so she learned embroidery and amazing cooking and she never really thought about a career. Everyone knew everyone’s business but I feel like people in the cities don’t have that, there are more opportunities. Over here, women are surrounded by a culture that’s centered on the career. Here they don’t believe in marrying women off and women have more of a chance to rise financially.

• Do you think arranged marriages work better than regular marriages?

o My parents had an arranged marriage but I don’t think the divorce rate is better for marriages that are arranged. I believe that if the woman’s not skilled then she’ll stay with her husband because she doesn’t have money. But I don’t know why they work so well, as statistics say. I don’t know why they stay together , whether it’s for love or what.

• How are the religious rituals different for men and women?

o The religious rites are not divided for males and females. My dad lights the candle for certain rituals but only because he wants to and sees it as his responsibility because the certain ritual regards a personal issue.

• What are your views on gender differences that exist?

o India- If a guy has a girlfriend, it’s deemed ok but you’re not getting married unless your parents approve, but a girl can’t even be with someone unless the parents are feeling generous. Gender differences are more universal. My mom doesn’t do this but parents usually prefer boys over girls. The boy will extend the lineage so he’ll get more preference. Two terms are sometimes used to describe daughters. Parya Dhan is “Foreign Wealth” and Amana means “Lended Object.” A girl is not yours. You are keeping her for eighteen years and then she gets married. It’s less an urban mindset, and more a village mindset. In cities, nowadays, the guy moves out. Back in the day, in joint families, the guy would be living with the parents and his wife, who would also be living with them, would also be taking care of them. But the daughter of a house would leave to move in with the in-laws when she gets married. That way she’s not able to take care of her own parents. A lot of time the daughter comes back to take care of parents but she visits them and doesn’t live with them. That’s why people want sons in their homes. It’s more of an investment. Who’s going to carry the family name if you don’t have boys? Stereotypically, he would be more protective.

• Do you know of any women in charge of temples in your area?

o My temple is the Hindu Temple in Flushing, Queens. There are no women in charge of it, but I know of one that has a woman in charge of it (in addition to the Ganesh temple).

--Aleksandra Polonetskaya 02:32, 2 April 2009 (UTC)